"I have solved every crime in America and the world for the last 15 years dating back to before Christ."

"All phenomenons guaranteed to be true by the United States Army. This is a U.S. Army FBI ROTC religion program. This made all of my Doctor’s degrees."

http://www.mercerforpresident2008.com

Hey, he can't do any worse than President Bubble Boy.

Please note the huge amount of sarcasm I'm using in this post (except for the above sentence, of course) -- I'll actually be supporting Obama.